“Hi Sis. I just got off the phone with Barb. A car fell on Jon.”
That’s not the phone call you expect when you’re on your way to a wedding.
That’s the phone call that makes you forget how to breathe.
I had just called my brother Jon the day before. Close in age, the two of us had grown us as best friends and virtual twins. We were now separated by 800 miles. I’d called to tell him my husband Ernie, our kids and I were driving from Grand Rapids Michigan to Tulsa Oklahoma for my stepson’s wedding. Jon and his wife Barb lived in Kansas City. We hadn’t seen them in over a year, but it was too far out of the way. We wouldn’t be seeing them again this year.
But a car fell on Jon. My only brother had been flattened by a broken-down hunk of metal.
My brain literally stopped working. Instead it started gasping.
There I was in the car, my husband Ernie behind the wheel shouting at me “Do I need to pull over?” My sister was on the cellphone screaming “He’s alive! He’s conscience!” and there was me in the middle gulping for air like a fish out of water, tears gushing like a fountain, repeating “Oh my God! Oh my God!” over and over.
In the back seat, the kids were all eerily silent for once. I’m sure they found their mother’s current mental state both frightening and fascinating.
My mind had defaulted to worst case scenarios: my brother was brain dead. He was paralyzed. He would spend the next few months in a hospital bed, in agony, and then die from his injuries. The loop played over and over, blocking out any other options. My sister had little information to counter my fears.
There was nothing we could do. Well, there was a LOT for ME to do. Panic. Cry. Worry. Shake. Replay the loop again and again.
Pray.
That option finally surfaced. Ernie pulled the van over and prayed for Jon and his family. And for me. Then, he drove us on toward Tulsa. There was nothing we could do to help Jon, and we still had a wedding to attend.
As the hours ticked by, phone calls trickled in.
Jon was in the ICU. The car had come down on his head and upper body. He was alive, and in and out of consciousness. When he was awake, he was talking cohesively. He was in pain and shock. There were fractures. Many, many fractures. His head, his chest, his shoulder…
I’m sorry to say, I don’t remember the wedding too well. The bride and groom were very understanding about it. They were aghast when they heard about Jon and shoed us out the door shortly after the “I do’s”, wishing us God speed, and Jon good health. We apologized profusely. This was Ernie’s oldest son’s wedding after all. He waved us off, assuring us he understood. We’d been there for him. Now we needed to be there for Jon.
Five hours later, we were walking into Jon’s hospital room. He was propped up in bed, looking very bruised and battered. His eyes were not quite working together, in a Peter Falk kind of way, but he smiled a little when he saw us.
“Hi Sis.” He greeted.
I shook my head. “Man, the stupid things you do just to get us to visit.” And then I started crying again. Then, he cried. Barb and Ernie cried. The kids stared at us, not caring for hospitals and unsure of how to respond.
We finally heard the whole story. Jon had been at his father-in-law Charles’ house working under his car. The jack holding the car up slipped and down came the vehicle on Jon. Charles got the jack back in place and cranked up. Meanwhile, Jon was wiggling his feet to let Charles know he was alive. Charles thought it was a sign of neurological shut down and Jon was brain dead. But once the car was off him, Jon actually tried to sit up. He passed out from the pain.
In the ER, they’d assessed his condition: multiple skull fractures. His shoulder was shattered. Nearly every rib on his left side had cracks and hairline breaks.
“How many fractures?”
“They lost count at 164.”
“What about your eye? Can they fix that?”
Barb shook her head. “We asked them, and they aren’t going to touch it. There’s multiple fractures to his skull. A lot are around the eye socket. But they’re all in place. None of the pieces have shifted any. If they try to go in, they’re going to move the pieces around and mess things up. They’re thinking as the swelling goes down and the fractures heal, his eye will realign, and his vision will be back to how it was.” She teared up again. “The doctors can’t figure it out! They keep coming in staring at him! He should be dead! He was pinned under a car! He should have been crushed, there should have been brain damage! There should be internal injuries! But look at him! He’s ok!”
I looked at my brother sitting there in the hospital bed, sheepishly staring back at us. He had a line of stitches in his scalp where his head had been gouged down to the bone. His face was bruised and a little swollen. The askew eye stared slightly off to the left of center. A plastic shield protected his chest. His right arm was immobilized.
That was it. No body cast. No amputated limbs. No brain damage. No paralysis. No permanent disfigurement.
A car had fallen on him.
164 fractures.
And 8 days after the accident, Jon was discharged from the hospital.
Life did not immediately return to normal. My brother was on disability for nearly four months as his ribs, vision and shoulder healed. During that time, his family was engulfed by friends and family pitching in to help out physically, spiritually, and financially. Doctors rebuilt his shoulder and his vision returned. Still, he suffers from periodic migraines and he can’t read for extended periods of time. He also lost a few of his character voices he used in his church’s puppet ministry. There’s a scar on his forehead that’s only noticeable if you specifically look for it.
But he is very much alive.
Psalms 113:11 says “You who fear the LORD, trust in the LORD; He is their help and their shield.” God was definitely holding a shield over my brother that day.
There are people who have the audacity to tell me they don’t believe in God. They claim that if there is a God, he doesn’t care. I stare at them in amazement and shake my head.
“Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head, and he fell to the ground and worshiped. And he said: ‘Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return there. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.’” Job 1:20-21.
In the first chapter of Job, the title character goes from riches to rags in a progressive series of gut-wrenching moments, one on the heels of the other. His possessions are striped from him, followed by his children and finally his health. All he’s left with is sores and boils, a nagging wife, and three friends who don’t provide much help.
I’ve had my share of gut-wrenching moments: Our home and belongings burned to the ground. A brother, his wife and their child were killed in a freak accident. My husband’s job was downsized after 22 years of loyalty to his company leading to relocating 800 miles from home and family. Two children lost to miscarriages. A stepson was killed in Iraq. My father died quite suddenly and unexpectedly from a blood clot to the heart.
Each and every one of these experiences sent me and my family into an emotional tailspin, but thankfully they were spread out over a lifetime allowing one to be absorbed and mourned before the next one struck. I cannot imagine experiencing all of them at once as Job did. Would I be able to say as he did “Bless be the name of the LORD”, or would I curl up in a catatonic ball screaming “WHY? WHY? WHY?” in my head?
Lord, I pray that I will never have to find out the answer to that question, but if it did, please take my hand and let me feel you by my side the whole time.
“And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father Noah and told his two brothers. But Shem and Japheth took a garment, laid it on both their shoulders, and went backward and covered the nakedness of their father. Their faces were turned away, and they did not see their father’s nakedness.” Genesis 9:22-23
When Noah woke up and found out what had happened, he cursed Canaan. Why Canaan? Many scholars believe it was because Canaan must have noticed Noah first and told his father. So why did Noah curse the boy? Did he laugh at his grandfather’s nakedness? Did he make fun of him or make lude comments? I don’t know. The Bible doesn’t say.
But, I remember when my dad died. My family and my brother’s descended upon his house to go through his belongings. That’s when we discovered Dad liked looking at pictures of naked ladies. LOTS of pictures of naked ladies. All the grandkids were banished from coming into the room as my husband, brother, sister-in-law, my dad’s brother-in-law, and I went through stack after stack of papers, sorting out important documents and tearing up lude pictures. We also excluded Dad’s current wife. She just lost her husband, and the rest of us felt it would be a great unkindness to expect her to endure this tarnish to his memory. A great purging occurred that left all us grownups feeling dirty and ashamed. But it was a part of my dad’s past we had no desire to expose our children to, especially my son Chris who was 18 at the time and had adored his grandpa. The shredded pictures would never be mentioned to them.
The bible tells us to honor our parents. There are times our parents act in ways that are not honorable, but even in those times we are called to preserve their dignity. God willing, our children will follow our example and honor us too.
And the LORD God commanded the man, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.” Genesis 2:16-17 NKJV
I used to wonder why Adam and Eve just didn’t keel over after biting the apple. After all, God said the day that you eat of it you shall surely die. But they didn’t, did they?
I remember when my kids were young giving them warnings: don’t run out in the street or you’ll get hit by a car! Don’t touch the stove or you’ll get burned! Don’t pull the cat’s tail or you’ll get scratched!
And that stuff didn’t happen, because as parents, we did what we could to prevent the disasters we predicted. Or when it did, we did everything in our power to save our child from the consequences of their actions and minimize the pain.
I’m thinking, like a good parent, God also did what he could to save Adam and Eve: he performed the first atonement sacrifice in which blood was shed to pay for the sin. Then he covered his children with the skins of the sacrificed animal. This served three purposes: it covered their physical nakedness, it symbolically covered their spiritual sin through the atonement, and it served as a constant reminder of their sin and God’s love for them.
And did you notice? God didn’t take away the consequence. He mercifully let them eventually die. In death, they were finally freed from the consequences to stand whole and pure before God again.
Fortunately, we don’t have to do sacrifices to cover our sin, as Jesus paid the ultimate price to purge and cleanse us. Just like Adam and Eve, though, we still have to face the consequences of our actions. But it’s nice to know we have a loving parent, and a big brother in Jesus, who are waiting there to welcome us with open arms when we are finally freed and are headed towards home.
And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. Genesis 1:3
Am I the only one who was perplexed that Light was the first thing God called into being, yet the sun wasn’t created until the fourth day? Day one: light. Day two: the earth’s atmosphere. Day three: land, sea and plants. Day four: the sun, the moon and the stars.
Huh.
I don’t think the “light” was a light source as we know it. I’m thinking this was in reference to Jesus Christ.
There are many references in the Bible where Jesus is referred to as Light:
John 1: 4 and 5 In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it.
In Psalms 27:1 The Lord is my Light and my salvation – whom shall I fear?
Psalms 104:2 He wraps Himself in light as with a garment.
Isaiah 60:19 The sun will no more be your light by day, nor will the brightness of the moon shine on you, for the LORD will be your everlasting light.
Christ Jesus was given the title first born of creation in Colossians 1:15, so he was there at the beginning of everything and creating everything. Not only was he at the beginning, he will also be at the millennial reign: There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.
And if we follow Christ, we are also in the light: John 8:12 I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.
I do curb duty one week each month at my school. I don’t care for standing out there in the cold, so I do what I can to jazz it up a bit. I’ve begun wearing funny hats and outfits. It makes people smile and laugh. My coworkers think I’m nuts. So be it.
If anyone asks me why I do it, I tell them this story:
I picked my son up from school a few years ago, and he asked the usual question: “How was your day?” So, I told him.
“Well, a kid threw up in my room, the copy machine jammed up again, and I forgot my lunch. All in all, it was a good day.”
Joe stared at me. “Mom, you had a rotten day.”
I shook my head. “Son, a few days ago, I watched a video of kids in Haiti eating dirt cookies because their mothers were too poor to feed them anything else. https://youtu.be/s3337cj4sJQ I’ve seen pictures of kids drinking from mud puddles who have no clean water.
All around the world, people are starving to death, being sold as slaves, abused or abandoned, living in refugee camps or on the streets.
We have a home. Your dad and I both have decent jobs. We are all healthy. Any day that doesn’t include a financial upheaval, a trip to the ER, or a call from the police is a good day.”
He thought about that a moment and then replied, “Mom, you had a good day.”
People wonder how I can stand at the curb in the morning wearing goofy hats or dress up in outlandish Christmas outfits. It’s because the good days in my life greatly outnumber the bad ones. Not all of the children I work with can say that. No all of my coworkers can. I don’t dress up for me. I dress up for them. To see them smile. To let them have one funny moment to start off their day with. It’s one small thing I can do for them. If I can cheer them up a little, then it’s mission accomplished.
So, Happy New Year, and may 2020 bring you and yours nothing but good days.
